In life and Death
by Mamabella
Summary: *Revamped and Beta'd* After a tragedy strikes, will Dixie be able to go on? and who will be there to help her pick up the pieces?
1. Chapter 1

I have finally had this story beta'd and I must say I believe it is much better! There were a bit more mistakes and faux pas then I realized (Yikes!)

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own them, I'm just borrowing them for fun, I don't have any money anyway!

**Notes:**

This is a Johnny/Dixie--Kel/Dixie Story that involves a character death hanky alert!

It also goes with Roy's faux pas In the movie that Dixie is about 30 years old at the start of the series.

This is from a very short unfinished orphaned story that I finished and tweaked.

_A thousand thanks to MonsterMoofie for all her beta help and suggestions. Couldn't have re-done it without you!!_

Reviews welcome good or bad but please no flaming if you don't like the pairings or character death, then don't read it!!

Now on with the story!


	2. Chapter 2

**In Life and In Death**

**By:** Bella

She hung up the phone and couldn't help but smile…she already knew the answer, but having it confirmed made it really real…yet she still almost couldn't believe it.

Just then Johnny strolled up to her desk.

"It's about time you stopped and said hi to me."

"Miss my charms Dix?"

"You'll never know how much," she laughed.

"You're still off tomorrow night, aren't you Johnny?"

"Sure am."

"Good, there's something I have to tell you."

Johnny raised his eyebrow. "Oh yeah, and what might that be?" he asked as he learned over the desk towards her.

"You'll just have to wait," she said in a very low and sultry voice.

"Oh man Dix! You can't leave me hanging like this."

_'Should I?'_ she thought. _'Maybe I should tell him.' _"Well…."

Just then Roy came jogging over. "Come on Junior, we have to go."

"Well I guess we will have to talk later Dix." He looked around and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek then hurried out the door.

The Rampart rumor mill had been working overtime since their romance began. Mostly because their relationship had seemed to come out of the blue. Although Dixie was older then Johnny**,** she wasn't that much older--just 6 years, but apparently some thought it was a big deal. She was totally gone--she'd never felt this way about anyone before. She had loved before, Kel being one of them, but never like this. Kel would never commit to anyone and she knew it. Johnny made her feel like no man had ever made her feel--_completely_ _and_ _totally_ _loved_.

Dixie was so deep in thought that she didn't hear Kel walk up behind her. She jumped at the sound of his voice. "Sorry Kel, I didn't know that you were there."

"You look really happy today, Dix. I don't suppose it has anything to do with the fact that Johnny was just here, does it?" Although Kel was happy for her, there was a slight hint of regret in his voice--he wasn't the object of her happiness.

"Am I that transparent, Kel?"

"Only to people that know you. So, do you and Johnny have something special planned?"

"Yeah."

"Care to share...or is it none of my business?"

"Well...it's kind of a secret."

"I see…it's those kind of plans. Well, I guess I'll see you later Dix."

Dix noticed that Kel acted strangely at times when it came to her relationship with Johnny. She supposed that was to be expected--considering their past relationship--she would probably feel the same way.

As Kel walked away, he couldn't help but wish that he was in Johnny's place, but he had his chance and blew it. He regretted it and wished he could go back and change it, but he couldn't--he would just have to live with his mistake. "_I swear, if I ever get a second chance with Dixie, I won't screw it up again!" _he thought.

A few hours later**, **Dixie was listening to the commotion over the LA County dispatch radio. Station 51, along with several other companies, had been called to a triple alarm abandoned warehouse fire. There were reports that several runaways were living in the building--station 51 had gone in to find them even though the building was quickly becoming unstable. The guys had rescued all of the kids and were almost out themselves when the accident happened. Johnny and a firefighter from station 36 were almost out when the floor gave away; they never had a chance. Dixie had heard there were fireman trapped and all she could do was pray that it wasn't Johnny. Then what she feared came; she felt like she couldn't breath, she didn't know what to do...she felt her world begin to collapse right before her eyes. Everything began to fade as she leaned against the wall--darkness soon overcame her and she slid to the floor.

Kel was at the other end of the hallway when he saw her collapse. He ran to her, but by the time he got there she was already on the floor--out cold.

He gently shook her "Dix wake up...come on Dix." He shook her again but she remained out cold. Kel picked her up and carried her to room 3 and carefully laid her down. "Come on, Dix wake up." He tried once again to rouse her.

Joe saw Kel carry Dixie into room 3 and followed him in, as did a student nurse who had overheard what transpired on the radio, but was unaware of the connection.

"Do you know what happened?" The Head of the ER asked the somewhat nervous student nurse.

"I'm really not sure, Dr. Brackett. We were listening to that really big fire over the radio when something about 2 fireman and a code 'F' or something. Um…oh yeah I think one of the names was John something."

Kel and Joe's hearts fell; they knew why their head nurse had fainted. Kel grabbed a ammonia cap and waved it under her nose. Meanwhile, Dr. Early went to check to see if that report was true.

She began to cough and slowly woke up. She opened her eyes and looked up into Kel's face. "It's true, isn't it?" she asked as Joe walked back in and nodded to Kel.

"Yes it is; I'm sorry Dixie." Kel pulled her into his arms and she began to sob almost uncontrollably.

"I can't believe this is happening...why...why...now."

"It's never a good time, Dix," Kel told the still sobbing nurse as he gently rubbed her back.

"I know but…but…you…don't understand. We had everything ahead of us…and I...I...never...got to...tell him." She tried to control her tears.

"Dix I know you're hurting but…."

She cut him off. "No, you don't understand. I...I...was going to make it special...tomorrow night. Oh...God...now he'll never know. He died and...and...I never got...to...tell him."

Kel just looked at her not sure what she meant.

She tried to compose herself; she took some slow deep breaths and held them for a few seconds--then let them out in an attempt to calm herself. "Kel, we got married 3 months ago in Las Vegas. This morning I found out that I am pregnant--I was planning on telling him tomorrow night."

Kel was at loss for words, so he just held her as she fell back against him and cried. When Dixie's tears were spent--for the moment--Kel took her to the privacy of his office.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

Roy walked into Rampart about an hour later very distraught looking for Dixie.

Joe spotted Roy and went up to him. "I'm so sorry, Roy; I heard about Johnny."

"I take it that Dixie already knows then."

"Yes, she does."

"How is she taking it?"

"Not very well I'm afraid, she in Kel's office now--she fainted when she found out--it took us about 15 minutes to get her to come around."

"God Joe--may I see her?"

"Sure, Roy."

Joe knocked on Kel's door not knowing quite what to expect.

"May we come in? I have Roy with me."

"Sure Joe," Dixie replied.

"Well I'll leave you two alone." Joe told the pair as he exited the room.

"Thanks Joe," Roy said.

"How are you holding Up Dix?" Roy sat down next to his partner's widow.

"I don't know, Roy. I don't think I can take this."

Roy already knew Johnny and Dixie had gotten married--so did the rest of the station now. He knew it was going to be even harder on her then anyone.

"I can't believe he's gone--he was there one minute and then next—just gone," Roy said shaking his head in disbelief.

"Roy I…I...have to know did...did he suffer?"

"No Dix, I don't think so. It happened so fast that I don't think he even knew what hit him."

"I'm glad of that anyway--I don't think I could take it if I knew that he suffered."

"God Dixie--Johnny's really gone--I can't believe it." Roy held his head in his hands.

"Roy, there's something I need to tell you--Johnny's not really gone."

"You're right, Dix we'll always have him in our memories."

"Yes, that's true Roy, but that's not what I meant…I'm pregnant…and...I..." she was struggling to hold back the tears as she tried to talk.

"I...didn't...get to tell him." She began to cry again. Roy put his arms around her and pulled her close--struggling to maintain his own composure.

"I just found out for sure this morning. I was planning to tell him tomorrow night...I wanted to make it special...If I only knew...I should have told him today when I found out. Oh God, Roy, why didn't I tell him**...why...I should have told him!**" she cried.

"Shhh, Dix. You couldn't have known--no one could have."

"I know...its...its just that..."

"I know Dix. I know." Roy didn't know what to say to the distraught nurse--he felt so sorry for Dixie. He just hoped that where ever Johnny was--he knew.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

The next few days went by as a blur for Dixie and with the exception of the funeral and official ceremony, she remained at home and cried. Just about everyone knew that they were married by now because of all the publicity. Johnny and the other fireman that died had been splashed all over the front page of all the newspapers and featured on TV news programs in practically a 3 state area. She just couldn't stand how people looked at her, especially since most of them did not know what to say. She thanked God that Roy, Joanne and Kel stayed by her deflecting most of the curious. Somehow the media found out that she was pregnant--she couldn't believe that.

So now everyone knew she was the pregnant widow of a LA County fireman/paramedic killed in a needless warehouse fire--one that turned out to be ruled arson. Because of the notoriety surrounding Johnny's death and the fire-- she was thankful that she had taken a few weeks off to get herself together. Right now the only things she knew for certain were she was going to be a single mother--her baby would never know its father--and she had never felt more alone in her entire life then she did right at this moment.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

It had been three weeks since Johnny died and almost two weeks since she had spoken to anyone. She knew she had to do something but she couldn't make herself do anything but lay there and cry. His smell was still everywhere--she could almost imagine he was at work--almost. She slept with his pillow, wore his flannel shirts everyday and couldn't bear to pack his things away. She sat on the couch holding his uniform shirt running her fingers over the patches. Her mind wandered back to the last night that they were together before he died.

_She had a really busy day at work and was exhausted when she got home. All she wanted to do was sit and put her feet up. When she got home Johnny wasn't there. 'Good,' she thought to herself. 'Now I can take a short nap.' She was so tired that she fell asleep as soon as she laid down on the couch the second her head hit the pillow. The next thing that she knew the smell of Chinese food permeated the air and someone was kissing her neck. _"U_ummmmmm that feels good." The way he kissed her there always made her melt._

"_I thought you might want some food; you have been sleeping a long time."_

"_What time is it?" She still sounded a bit sleepy._

"_7:30."_

"_7:30? Oh my gosh, I can't believe I slept that long; I only want to take a little nap."_

"_Well I guess you needed it," Johnny said between kisses._

"_Miss me?" she asked._

_  
"Yeah I thought you were never going to wake up," he whispered into her ear._

"_Why...is there something in particular you wanted from me?" she asked in a very deep and seductive voice._

"_Well now that you mention it...yes."_

"_What is it that you want from me, huh?" she purred. _

"_You."_

"_I think I can arrange that." She rolled to her back, pulling Johnny with her and into a deep and very passionate kiss._

"_Why don't we move this to the bed?_" _Johnny suggested._

"_Okay," She whispered. _

_She remembered how they undressed each other, the way he touched her, how his hands felt as they caressed every inch of her body, and how his lips kissed every part of her. What it felt like at the moment they became one_; _it took her breath away in a wave of ecstasy she had never felt before. She remembered when she lay in his arms afterwards and how he whispered, "I love you," in her ear._

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

Kel was getting worried about her--he hadn't heard from her in 2 weeks. He had called several times but there was never any answer. Finally, he decided that he had better go over and check on her. He figured that she was probably hiding out, but he had to make sure.

Dixie was pulled out of her thoughts by a knock at the door.

"Dix, it's me, Kel, I know you're in there; come on; open the door."

Knowing that he would not go away she sighed and reluctantly got up off the couch and answered the door. "What can I do for you Kel?" she asked him with another sigh.

"I just wanted to make sure that you're okay; I've been worried about you."

"As you can see, I'm fine, Kel."

"You don't seem fine to me, Dix. You're pale--you don't look like you have slept in weeks. Judging how you look, you've been crying a lot and I'll bet you haven't been eating well--if at all--have you?"

She didn't say anything, she just shrugged her shoulders--after all what could she say--he was right.

"Dix you of all people know that you should be taking care of yourself- - especially now."

"I know. . . I know," she said in a somewhat defeated tone.

"When was the last time you have eaten anything decent or have been out of this apartment?" She didn't look at him she just kept staring down at the floor. "Just as I thought. Probably not since the funeral, right?"

"Yeah, but Kel, it's just been so hard. You don't understand."

They sat down on the couch and he studied her for a moment. "I do Dix. How come you never told anyone that the two of you were married?"

She smiled at the thought of how that happened. "It's kind of a funny story, Kel."

"I'm all ears."

"Well, we had been seeing each other for awhile, so we decided to go to Vegas for a weekend, just to get away. We had gotten pretty drunk at one of the casinos and decided to go for a walk. I guess somehow we ended up in one of those wedding chapels, because the next thing we knew we woke up with rings on our fingers and a marriage license on the nightstand. After the shock--and our hangovers--wore off we decided that we did love each other and what the heck! We decided that we would try and see if it worked--and if it did. In 6 months, we would tell everyone and have a real wedding--with all of our friends--but we would keep it to ourselves until then. The only people that knew were those at the personal office of the LACFD, Roy and Capt. Stanley. Since he moved in with me I didn't have to tell Rampart anything."

"I see. I have to admit, it is kinda funny."

"Yeah, it is." She was still smiling at the memory.

"Dixie, you have to take care of yourself. You have more then just yourself to consider now; you owe it to Johnny and that baby you are carrying."

She just Nodded in agreement.

Kel took her by the shoulders and looked at her eye to eye. "Dix, Johnny would not want you to be like this--you know that--you have to pull yourself together."

"I know I do Kel...I'm running out of food and clothes that fit...I guess I'll have to get out sometime soon," she said with a half of a smile on her face. "I'll be okay, Kel...really I will." She just looked at him.

Kel wasn't entirely convinced. "Look Dix I'll make you a deal. How about I leave you alone tonight to pull yourself together—and you promise me something." Dixie looked at him for a minute then nodded her head slightly. "Okay Kel what do you have in mind?"

"I talked to Joanne to see if she is available tomorrow to go out shopping with you, she is more then willing to go with you to pick up groceries and help you get some cloths that fit." He couldn't help but let out a small laugh. "And you let me bring you dinner tomorrow night about 7. You sill do like Chinese, don't you?"

You are kidding, Kel—Right?"

Kel just smiled at her. "Okay, I'll see you tomorrow and I expect to see some to see some food and new cloths or I'm, dragging you out with me tomorrow. Got it?"

"Yes Kel, I got it! I will see you tomorrow." She got up and walked him to the door.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Dix." He leaned over and gave her a kiss on her cheek.

"Okay, Kel." She closed the door and went back to lay down on the couch thinking about what Kel had said to her while she drifted off to sleep.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

**He looked down at her as she lay sleeping on the couch; she looked so beautiful**--**God he missed her so much. He missed her touch, her feel, the silkiness of her hair, her smell and the way she felt when they made love.**

"**She needs your help to move on you know," he heard a voice say.**

"**How can I help her now**--l**ike this?" He gestured to her current state.**

"**You have more power then you realize." They stayed there for a bit, just looking at her. **

"**There's something else that you need to know."**

"**What's that?"**

"**She's pregnant."**

**"HUH...WHAT!! You're...you're...kidding, right?!"**

"**She found out the morning that you died."**

"**How...how long?"**

"**4 months**--**at first she ignored it**--s**he thought it was stress from everything that had been going on these last few months."**

"**Is she going to be okay? I mean...she has to be okay."**

"**She'll be okay**--**if you help her."**

"**How am I supposed to do that**--**have you forgotten that I'm dead?" **

"**You'll see Johnny**--**you'll see."**

**Johnny floated down to where Dixie lay sleeping and whispered, "I love you Dix, never forget that." Then they were gone.**

Dixie woke up the next morning and surprisingly felt better then she had since Johnny died.

"Well Little one, should we go shopping for some clothes? First, let's see if I can find something that I can still fit into." She laughed to herself as she walked into the bathroom.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

Dixie and Joanne had a successful shipping trip. She bought enough clothes to last her for awhile, some groceries, and then--she couldn't help herself--she had to buy something for the baby. She couldn't resist the stuffed animal--it is was so cute. After returning to her apartment she felt exhausted, so she decided to take a nap before Kel came over for dinner.

Kel arrived precisely at 7 o'clock that night and was pleasantly surprised--and a bit shocked--to see that she actually went out and did what she said she would.

Dinner was good; Kel was pleased that Dixie seemed to have an appetite again. When they had finished, he excused himself, placing a gentle kiss on her cheek. "I'll be by tomorrow afternoon to see how you're doing."

After he left, she couldn't help but let her mind wander to Johnny. _'How would he have reacted to the baby? Would he have been happy?' _ Her eyes filled with tears.

**"Please don't cry, I would have been ecstatic! **_**I**_ _**am**_ **ecstatic! I just wish that I was able to be here for you and our babies."**

She felt a warm breeze go through her hair and heard the words, "I love You**.**"

"I love you too**,**" Dixie replied before she realized what just happened--she froze--she smelled him. She slowly looked around but didn't see anything, yet she knew that she had heard Johnny's voice! She wasn't sure what had just happened, but it made her feel at peace.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

Time goes by whether you want it too or not, in time Dixie went back to work, she began to cry less and less and things began to get a little easier.

She was now 5 months along and everyone knew she was pregnant--and who the father was. She hated the way people looked at her as if to say, "Poor Dixie alone and pregnant after Johnny's death." It seemed like no one ever thought about the baby; the fact that he or she would never know their father. To her that was the real tragedy of the situation. All of a sudden she gasped and her hand flew to her stomach. Kel, who was standing behind her, jumped. "What's wrong?"

Dixie laughed. "Nothing, I just got kicked, that's all."

"Don't scare me like that Dix!"

She took his had and placed it on her stomach. "Here, feel."

"That's amazing, Dix. It's so hard to believe that there's a baby in there."

"I Know." They finished their conversation and went back to work. The rest of the shift was

going by surprisingly good--which was rare in the ER.

"Dix, there's a phone call for you."

"Thanks Betty."

"This is Miss McCall. How may I help you?"

"Miss McCall." A lump just formed in Dixie's throat as she recognized the voice of her building super, Mrs. Harris.

"I'm afraid I have some bad news for you**--**there was a fire in our building and several

apartments were totally destroyed; I'm afraid yours was one of them. I'm so sorry**--**I know you have been through a lot lately**.**"

Dixie was so stunned she didn't know what to say.

"Miss McCall, are you still there?"

"Sorry...Mrs. Harris did you say everything? Everything is gone?"

"Yes, I'm sorry. I just wanted to let you know before you came home to this."

"Well, thank you Mrs. Harris...I guess." Dixie hung up the phone and just sat there pretty much too stunned to move. All of a sudden the reality of the situation sunk in and she ran for the break room and began to cry--completely taken over by her hormones.

Kel saw her go into the break room and followed her. "Dix, what's wrong? Are you okay? Is it the baby?" He rattled off the questions in quick succession.

"No. The super from my building just called. There was a fire...everything I have is gone! Everything...I don't even have a toothbrush left." She began to cry again.

Kel pulled her into a hug; she couldn't believe that everything was gone--everything. All of her stuff and some of Johnny's. Thankfully though, Johnny had stored some of his things in Roy's basement because there was no more room at her place.

"Sshhh, everything is going to be ok."

"How Kel? I can't believe this. What am I going to do now?" She was getting more and more

worked up by now.

"Dix, relax. It will be okay."

"But wher. . . . . "

Kel felt her go limp in his arms--he quickly laid her on the couch. Thankfully, just then a nurse walked in the room. "_Go get a gurney!"_ Dr. Brackett commanded the nurse.

"Yes, Dr. Brackett." The nurse quickly turned on her heels and out the door she went.

"Dix, come on, wake up. Please don't do this again."

Dr. Brackett took her pulse--it was 118--which was to be expected considering how upset she was. The nurse returned with a gurney and Dr. Early on her heels. Kel picked Dixie up and placed her on the gurney and they quickly made their way into treatment room 4.

"Kel, what happened?" Dr. Early asked as they made their way to the treatment room.

"She just found out that there was a fire at her apartment building and she lost everything, Joe. She was telling me what happened--I was trying to get her to calm down--she was crying almost uncontrollably--then she just passed out."

"Cathy, get a set of vitals," barked out Dr. Brackett

"Yes, doctor."

"Dr. Brackett her BP is only 80/52, respirations are 20 and pulse is 134."

"Start an IV with normal saline, 500cc bolus then TKO."

"Yes, doctor."

"Well I guess that's probably why she fainted Kel, her BP is way too low," Dr. Early stated.

"Joe, I'm going to call Dr. Carter and let him know what's going on.

"Okay**,** Kel."

After a little while Dix began to moan.

"Dix can you hear me? It's Kel."

She opened her eyes and looked around for a minute trying to get her bearings.

"God Kel, I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what, Dix? Don't talk like that. You have nothing to be sorry for."

"What...what happened"

"You fainted, Dix. It turns out that your blood pressure was very low. We gave you some IV fluids and it's back up to an acceptable range."

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

Dr. Carter had decided that she should stay the night even though he was fairly sure everything was okay. Dixie wasn't happy about that at all.

A little while later as she laid there she couldn't stop the tears from coming. _'Damn Hormones,'_ she thought.

Just then, Kel walked in. "Hey what's wrong?"

"Kel, what am I going to do? I just can't believe this happened...I don't have anything left...nothing!"

"You're going to come and stay with me; that's what you're going to do! I have that big house all to myself and I'm not going to have you in some hotel alone."

"I can't do that."

Kel was prepared for this, so he walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed. "Yes you can…I'm not taking no for an answer. Got it?!" Dixie knew there wasn't an point in arguing with him when he had that tone in his voice; frankly she was relieved.

"Okay, thanks Kel."

"Now Dix, try and get some rest okay? I'll check in on you later before I leave."

"Okay, Kel, and thanks." He smiled as he walked out the door.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

He suddenly felt drawn to Dix; something was wrong and he felt an overwhelming need to go to their apartment and see what was wrong. When he looked around he knew why he had been drawn there and why she needed him. He had to go to her.

He entered the room and saw her laying there in that hospital bed looking very small and very vulnerable, rubbing her belly--struggling to maintain her composer and to not completely breakdown.

"I miss him too little one," she quietly whispered. Dixie laid her head back against the pillows and closed her eyes_. "God I wish he was here right now...I need him so much right now," _she thought_. _At that moment, Dixie wanted nothing more then to fall into Johnny's arms and make the rest of the world go away. She was brought out of her thoughts when she felt a gentle breeze ripple through her hair and then she smelled him--his scent filled the room.

"You're here...aren't you?" She felt warmth embrace her hand resting on her belly and the baby responded with a kick. Dixie knew he was there--with her--with them.

"God...I miss you so much...so much it hurts. Sometimes it hurts so bad I don't think I can stand it."

As Johnny enveloped her in warmth, she felt an immense sense of calm wash over her body...a feeling she hadn't felt since before Johnny died.

"I love you Johnny," she whispered.

"I love you too, Dix; I'll always be here for you and our babies...don't ever forget that," she heard him whisper in her ear--and then he was gone.

Relief washed over her; she knew that Johnny was okay and that he knew about their baby. That made Dixie truly happy--that he knew he was going to be a father--but she still couldn't help the sadness that he would never be with her in this life again. At least she knew that someday they would be together again.

Johnny was glad that Dr. Brackett was there taking care of her--if he couldn't be there, he couldn't think of anyone else he'd rather have take his place. Johnny knew Dixie was not thinking anything of that sort at this moment in time, but Johnny also knew that Dr. Brackett still loved her and would never do anything to hurt her.

Kel walked into Dixie's room with Dr. Carter trailing right behind. "How are you feeling today, Dix?" he asked

"Better, but I will feel even better when I can get out of here."

"Well let's see what's going first," Dr. Carter replied. He took her vital signs; he knew what Kel had heard yesterday down in the ER and was now hearing the same thing.

Dixie became worried with the look that Dr. Carter had on his face. "What's wrong?" a very nervous sounding Dixie asked her Obstetrician.

Dr. Carter held up a finger--he took his stethoscope out of his ears and looked at Kel.

"Well?" Dr. Brackett asked

"You were right, Kel."

"What's wrong?" she was getting really worried now.

"Relax Dixie there's nothing wrong; you're just having twins." The OB told his worried patient

"TWINS...ARE YOU...YOU...KIDDING ME?! I can't believe it…this can't be happening."

"You were a little dehydrated and a bit under weight for carrying twins and I know you have been under a lot of stress, but you really need to take better care of yourself." The concerned doctor informed his patient.

"Alright," Dixie mumbled--she was still in a state of shock. It was then that she realized that Johnny had said babies not baby. She quietly chuckled to herself.

"I want you to take the rest of the week off; I also want to see you in my office on Friday, okay?"

"Okay, okay...now can I go home?"

"Yes, but only if you promise me that you'll take it easy."

"She will….I'll make sure of it," Kel told the other doctor.

"Okay, then Dixie I will see you on Friday."

"Okay, Dr. Carter and thank you."

"Well Dix, why don't you get ready and I'll be back in a few minutes." Kel stated.

"Okay, but don't be too long."

The good doctor was back before long with a wheelchair. "Ready to get out of here, Dix?" Kel asked his rather impatient head nurse.

"You bet Kel. Lets get out of here."

"I know you need to buy some things, but how about we get something to eat first?"

"That sounds good."

"Anything in particular?"

"Yes…a greasy hamburger and fries."

"Okay, your wish is my command, ma'am."

After the two ate they picked out just a few things for her, figuring they would get the rest tomorrow when she was feeling better.

When the two arrived at Kel's house, he gave her the guest room figuring it would the best place because it had its own bathroom.

"Thanks Kel...for everything."

"You know I'll always be here for you, don't you?"

"I know."

Kel, feeling uncomfortable, quickly changed the direction of the conversation.

"You look beat, Dix. Why don't you get some sleep and tomorrow if you're up to it we'll get some more of your things, okay?"

"You're right, I am exhausted." Dixie's head suddenly shot up as the question struck her. "Wait, Kel, what about work? Don't you have to work tomorrow?"

"I took a couple days off." he replied very nonchalantly.

"YOU! You took a couple days off?!" _'That in itself could have caused me to faint a third time,'_ she thought.

"Yeah, I can't trust you to do what the doctor says, now can I?"

"Very funny, Kel."

"Now go to bed and I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay. Goodnight Kel." Dixie made her way to her room and quickly got ready for bed. She was asleep before her head hit the pillow.

The next few days went by in a blur. Thankfully she had insurance for her things, which helped. After a few short outings she replaced most of her clothing and personal items. Dixie thought she would start looking for a small house in the next couple weeks--Kel had offered to go with her. That Friday, her appointment with Dr. Carter went well except that he wanted to see her every two weeks from now on.

After her appointment, she laid on the couch and decided to try and take a nap. _'Gosh, it's getting hot in here,'_ she thought. Then she thought she smelled smoke; she looked around and saw flames everywhere. "Oh god, the house is on fire!" She couldn't find her way out, then she saw Johnny trying to get to her through the flames but he couldn't reach her. "JOHNNY HELP ME! PLEASE DON'T LET ME DIE!" she yelled. Then Johnny started to disappear back through the flames. "JOHNNY PLEASE DON'T GO--HELP ME, PLEASE!" She continued to yell as she helplessly tried to reach for him.

Kel was just getting home from the hospital and as soon as he walked through the door he heard Dixie yelling.

"JOHNNY, PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME, DON'T GO NOOOOOOOO!"

Kel rushed over to her and shook her shoulders. "Dix, wake up; you're dreaming." He got no response, so he shook her a little harder. "Dix your dreaming...come on wake up," he said even louder.

Suddenly her eyes popped open and she looked around trying to grasp her bearings. "Kel" was all she got out before she started crying.

He quickly pulled her into a hug and just held her. "SSHHHH, it's okay. It was just a dream," he told her as he continued to try and calm the distraught woman.

"Kel, it was so real...he was right there…so close, but… but.. he couldn't get me… and then he was gone…he…he just faded away," she said between sobs. "There were flames everywhere."

Finally she started to calm down. "I'm sorry, Kel. Lately I seem to always be crying on your shoulders."

"That's okay, Dix, my shoulders are available for you to cry on anytime--free of charge."

She smiled. "Kel, I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been here for me through all of this."

"What are friends for Dix? Besides, you and Johnny would have done the same for me, wouldn't you?"

"You know we would have."

"Hey how about chinese for dinner--that always makes you feel better--and something tells me you haven't eaten yet."

"No I haven't. I was going to cook something, but I fell asleep--I'm sorry."

"Well why don't you go and get ready and we'll go out."

"Ok Kel, are you sure?"

"Positive! Now go get ready...I'm hungry."

As they were finishing up dinner, Kel looked at Dixie. "Dix, I was thinking."

She looked up to him and raised her eyebrow.

"Yeah...what about?" she replied looking at him with a questioning expression.

"You're due in what...3½ months, maybe earlier, right?"

"Yeah...and..." She was getting more curious as to where this was going.

"I was thinking…that it would be better if you stayed with me until after the babies are born." She started to say something and Kel held up his finger. "Just hear me out ok?"

She nodded. "Okay, Kel…go ahead."

"Well even if you do find a house in time you'll have to furnish it and get it ready for the babies--all while you're pregnant, working and alone. What if something happens? There will be no one there to help you before or right after you have the babies. You have no family and there's no one that could really stay with you. If you stay with me you would be able to take more time off after the babies were born than you would if you have the burden of paying for a house. I would feel a lot better if you were here--not all alone where anything could happen."

Dixie just looked at him for a moment…. not sure what to say. "Kel…I…I don't know what to say."

"Say okay you'll stay."

"What about work? You know how the grapevine is--and what about the board?"

"We wont tell them," he told her in a very casual manner.

"I would feel like I'm imposing--and what about the babies...after they're born."

"What about them? They can stay in the room that's next to yours."

"Do you know all the stuff that a baby comes with? Let alone two of them...and what about the fact that they get up during the night?"

"I know all that, Dix."

"What if you want to go out with someone."

"Dix, when was the last time you saw me on a date?"

She started to giggle. "Well that's true," she said to him.

"It's not that funny," he said with a smile. ''Well what do you say Dix?"

Part of her didn't want to be alone, but she didn't want to impose either; she knew it was probably better to stay with Kel than to be alone--just in case. Plus she was running out of excuses to throw at him. After thinking about it, she finally answered him. "Okay, Kel...I guess I'll stay."

**Johnny looked down on the pair and smiled...he felt better knowing that she wasn't going to be alone through this.**

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

No one knew that Dixie was staying at Kel's except for Joe, Roy, Joanne and the guys at the station. They were all sworn to secrecy as far as Rampart was concerned. Both Dixie and Kel worked on getting the room ready for the babies. This should have surprised Dixie at Kel's domesticity, but after all he had done almost nothing he did anymore surprised her.

Work was becoming harder for Dixie. She was tired all of the time, her back hurt more and more every shift, but she knew that she wasn't going to last working until the end of her pregnancy. She had hoped she could continue because she would rather be working; it kept her mind off missing Johnny--although it was getter a bit easier--she still would rather keep busy. She was glad that she had decided to stay with Kel. Some days she barely had the energy to shower and eat after work. Kel had been so supportive and caring…sometimes she almost couldn't believe he was really the same man the she knew, worked with and dated. If he had been more like this when they were dating she wondered if they would have ever broken up. Although she loved Kel when they were together, still cared for him and in some ways still loved him, she knew that she would never love anyone the way that she loved Johnny ever again...Johnny was her one and only but even though it would never be the same as what she had with him, she hoped that one day someone would come along and fill the space that Johnny left. _'Oh well, I guess Kel's water under the bridge….'_

"Dix how's it going?" Roy asked breaking her out of her daydream.

"Fine Roy, how's your day going so far?"

"Not bad, Dix...um Dix, I'd like you to meet Carl…he's going to be my permanent partner," Roy informed the head nurse in a somewhat somber tone.

"Carl this is Dixie...she is the head nurse here. If you need anything just go to her and she'll get it for you."

"Nice to meet you Carl."

"Same here. Is this your first?" he asked, pointing to her very rounded belly.

"Yes it is."

"I bet your husband is excited." Roy jumped in before anything could be said.

"Sorry Dix I didn't get a chance to tell him."

"That's okay, Roy." Carl was looking a bit perplexed by this time.

"Sorry Carl, Dixie is Johnny's wife.''

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Carl you didn't know." Thankfully the HT went off telling the paramedics they had a run.

"Dix it looks like we have to go I'll see you later."

"See you guys later." It was a good thing that the ER was busy that day; Dixie didn't have time to think of anything other then work. Before she knew it, her shift was over and she was very glad to be going home. She stopped by Kel's office to see when he was coming home.

"You look tired Dix, are you feeling okay?"

"I'm ok Kel, I'm just tired and my back hurts--that's all. I was just wondering when you're coming home?"

"I won't be late tonight."

"Okay, Kel…I'll see you in a little while then."

Dixie was glad that she put a roast in the Crockpot before she went to work; it was ready and waiting when she got home. She had about a month to go before she went on leave but all she could think about was whether or not she was going to make it or not.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

The next few weeks went by and she only had a couple more days to go before her leave; it couldn't come too soon as far as she was concerned. Dixie never thought that she would feel that way but this last week she did. It was a typical day in the ER considering it was a Friday--and a full moon to boot. All of a sudden a girl came running into the ER.

_Help!_ _Can someone help me please? My Boyfriend is sick._

Kel went out, followed by two orderlies with a gurney. "Take him to treatment room three," barked Dr. Brackett. After the man was transferred to the treatment table the doctor spoke to Dixie. "Dix, get a set of vitals."

"Okay, doctor."

"Start an IV D5 and NS TKO."

"Miss let's step out in the hall for a minute, okay?" Dr. Brackett and the girlfriend made their way out into the hall while Dixie continued to worked on their patient.

"Miss, can you tell me what happened?" Dr. Brackett asked the shaken girl.

"I don't know...he just wouldn't wake up."

"Does he take any medication or _any_ other drugs?"

"Maybe...I...I don't know for sure though."

"Do you know what he might have taken?"

"No, it could have been anything."

"Does he have any health problems?"

"Not that I now of."

Suddenly, they heard a loud crash coming from the room and a man yelling, "No don't touch me! Get away!" Dr. Brackett ran into the room and was followed quickly by Joe and Betty. When they entered they saw Dixie trying to get off of the ground and the patient cowering in the other corner. Joe went over to the Patient and Kel quickly ran to Dixie.

"Are you okay, Dix?" the very concerned doctor asked the somewhat shaken nurse as he helped her get up off the ground.

"Yeah I think so."

"Lets go next door and check you out, okay?"

"Kel...I'm fine, really.''

"Let me be the judge of that, okay?" Relenting, she followed him into the next room. He helped he get up onto the exam table.

"Do you hurt anywhere, have any cramping or anything?"

"No…I really do feel okay, Kel."

"Look you just sit here for a minute and rest while I go and check on my patient ok? I'll be right back.''

"Okay, Kel"

She really didn't mind sitting there; she needed to calm down and it felt good to get off of her feet so she just leaned her head back and closed her eyes. A little while later Kel came back.

"Well how do you feel now?"

"Ok my back is just a little sore, but other then that I feel fine. . really Kel."

"Look I want you to take the rest of the day off…go home and put your feet up and rest…and don't argue with me, okay?"

Dixie knew she wasn't going to get out of this one so she just agreed. "Okay, Kel I will."

"And when I get home I better find you sitting with your feet up. Got it?"

"Yes sir!" she said as she saluted him.

"I'll bring dinner...Chinese?''

"How did you ever guess?"

"I'm just lucky I guess."

Dixie made her way to her locker got her sweater and purse and quietly left. When she got home she decided that she would lay down for a bit...she sat down on the couch, kicked off her shoes, laid down and promptly fell asleep. When Kel got home he was surprised and happy to see that she actually listened to him for a change...without arguing.

"Dix wake up. I've come bearing Chinese," he called out to her.

"Kel." She smiled as she sat up.

"Yep just me. How are you feeling?"

"Fine, just a little sore and a lot hungry." They decided to relax and eat in the living room on the couch while they watched Adam 12 on TV. After they finished their dinner they watched a bit more TV, but Dixie was still tired from her earlier adventure.

"Well, I guess I'm going to go to bed Kel."

"It's kinda early, isn't it Dix?"

"Yeah it is, but I'm tired and my back hurts as usual. I just want to lay down."

"Remember to get me if anything happens."

"I will and don't worry so much...look, relax...watch your TV okay? Goodnight, I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight Dix. Sleep well."

She nodded and waved her hand back over her head as she walked down the hall towards her room. Her back did hurt more then usual but she wasn't about to tell Kel; he would drive her nuts and probably want to take her back to Rampart. She didn't think it wasn't anything to get worried about; after all, she was just tossed up against a wall--her back was bound to be a little more sore then usual. She just hoped in the morning it would be a little better, but she figured it would most probably be a little sore for a couple more days.

Suddenly, she was jolted out of a deep sleep by a sharp pain that ripped through her abdomen. After a bit it subsided and she made her way to the bathroom. Another contraction hit her, causing her to double over in pain, then she felt her water break. "Dammit!" She grabbed a towel and wiped it up then went to go and wake up Kel. He wasn't in his bedroom, so she figured that he must have fallen asleep watching TV. She made her way out to the living room and sure enough, he had fallen asleep in front of the television. Dixie reached down and shook his shoulder. "Kel. . . Kel"

He jumped up. "What's wrong?"

"My Wat... " She didn't finish--another contraction hit and she doubled over and groaned.

Kel was able to grab a hold of her before she fell to the floor. "Dix, breathe." He just held her until the contraction subsided, then he helped her sit down on the couch.

"Dix, when did they start?" he asked as he sat next to her.

"About twenty minutes ago. They woke me up out of a sound sleep; I got up and went to the bathroom and then my water broke."

"I'm going to go get dressed and take you in, okay?"

"Okay," Dixie responded in a rather shaky voice.

"I'll be right back," he called as he went to go and get dressed. Kel was just about finished getting dressed when he heard Dixie yell.

"KEL!!"

He quickly came running back into the living room. "What is it?"

"I don't think...I'm going to make it," she panted out.

"Okay first let me see were you are at" He helped her get into position.

"Dix I'm going to call for a squad." He didn't get a chance--another contraction hit.

"Kel I have to push."

"Dix I want you to breath through it ok?... I'll be right back"

"OH GOD," she panted.

"That's good Dix just breathe. I'll be right back."

He quickly ran and called the fire department then went and grabbed his bag and some things he had gotten from the hospital just in case something like this should happen...he wanted to be prepared. He ran back into the living room.

''Kel, I'm scared"

"Everything is going to be okay."

He quickly got things ready and moved Dixie onto the floor, then he listened for fetal heart tones. Thankfully they were good and strong. "They sound good Dix."

"OHH KEL...I have to push...NOW!"

"Okay, Dix. Go ahead and push."

"AARRGGGGGGGGGGGG," she groaned out as she pushed.

"Almost Dix. Push again on the next contraction, okay?"

All she could do was nod. The next contraction hit and she pushed as hard as she could.

"Okay, Dix the head is out." Kel suctioned out the nose and mouth.

On the next contraction the rest of the baby slid free from her body and began to cry.

"It's a girl, Dix."

"Is...is...she ok?" she rasped out.

"She perfect, Dix. Lots of dark hair...just like her dad."

Right then the squad arrived. Kel quickly finished cutting the cord and wiping her off he then wrapped the newborn in a blanket and laid her next to Dixie.

Kel felt for the other baby; it was still high and transverse. Kel knew if they hurried they could get her to Rampart and section her if they had to. When Roy and Carl walked in, Kel quickly told Roy what the situation was and Roy agreed to the plan. They called ahead to Rampart so they would be ready, then they quickly set about getting their patients ready to transport.

"Dix, the other baby is transverse. We have to get you to Rampart as soon as we can, okay?"

"Kel, don't let anything happen to her. Please, Kel!" She grabbed a hold of his shirt, practically begging him not to let anything happen to her other baby.

"You all are going to be fine...I promise they are already waiting for us, okay?"

"Okay," came her barely audible reply. The squad quickly made its way to Rampart. Unfortunately they had to section the other baby--who was the spitting image as her sister. Both had dark hair just like Johnny and Blue eyes like Dixie's. They were breathing on their own and appeared to be perfectly healthy. They weighed in at 5lbs 3oz and 5lbs 6oz.

**He stood there…just watching her sleep. **_**'She's so beautiful,'**_ **he thought, God I love you…and our daughters. "They're beautiful, Dix. I can't believe that we made them--you and me."**

**He longed to hold his wife and daughters. It was then he notice the name on the bassinets 'baby girl 1 Gage' and 'baby girl 2 Gage.' He really don't know what else to expect; after all that was their name….her name. He had also noticed that she wore her wedding ring ever since he had died. He wished so much that they'd had a chance at a life together. Even though Johnny knew Dixie was going to be a single mom, he was glad that she had their daughters with her always and he--they would go on.**

Kel was sitting in Dixie's room watching her sleep, too.

After a bit she began to stir. Opening her eyes she turned and looked at Kel. "Are they okay?"

"Yes, Dix they're perfect. Two little girls with dark hair and blue eyes. They are beautiful, Dix."

"When can I see them?"

"I'll go see, okay?"

She nodded as he got up to go and check.

Kel soon returned with a nurse and babies in tow. "Well Dix, here they are." After he helped her sit up, Kel handed one of them to her and picked up the other one so she could see her also.

She couldn't believe what she felt for them...then the tears came.

"They are beautiful Kel. I can't believe they are mine."

"They are all yours. So, what are you going to name them?"

"Well this one I'm going to name 'Jaci Lynn.' Jaci is the name for the moon and Johnny always loved looking at the moon."

"And this little one?" Kel asked holding up the other baby.

"I was thinking if you wouldn't mind I would like to name her 'Kelly Rose,' because I don't know If I would have made it if it wasn't for you. All these months. And the rose is for Johnny's Aunt who raised him."

"Dix I'm honored. I don't know what to say."

Kel bent down and hugged her and kissed her cheek, then placed Kelly next to her in the bed.

"I'll give you sometime alone with them. I have to check on something, okay?" He quickly got up and made his way to the door.

"Okay, Kel." Dixie knew Kel well enough to know why he was making a hasty exit, and that brought a smile to her face. She just sat there looking at her daughters. "Your daddy would have been so happy right now...do you know that?" she quietly told them as she felt her eyes fill with tears. Even though she tried to fight it, they spilled over, running down her cheeks. At that moment her heart began to ache for him...she felt it breaking all over again.

"Johnny I miss you...God how I wish you were here."

She felt that familiar warm gentle breeze go by her face and through her hair. Something made her look over to the other side of the room; where the breeze came from. She saw a shimmering ball of light that transformed right before her eyes and Johnny was standing there

"Johnny," she whispered.

"Dix, I want you to know that I will always be with you and our daughters…they are so beautiful Dix. Tell them how much I love them."

She began to cry again as he began to move closer to her.

"I'll love you always...be happy Dix.. Please don't forget to be happy."

"I love you too, Johnny."

She felt his warmth brush against her lips then envelope her in peace she hadn't felt in a while, then he was gone again. She smiled and felt peace, but couldn't stop the tears from coming. Even though she knew he was with her, it still hurt. She hoped that one day she would be able to think about him without the tears and only a smile.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

After five days Dix was more then ready to go home. Kel had taken some time off to help her with the babies--which left Dixie totally and completely speechless--but she dared not say a word about it to him. It made her feel good that he cared that much for her and the babies that he was willing to do that for her. It almost made her feel like she could fall for him all over again. Dixie still loved him as a friend, but could she...she wondered…right then Kel walked into the room and broke her out of her thoughts.

"Ready to go, Dix?"

"More then ready. Take us home, please."

They finally got home and settled. Dixie fed the babies and put them down to sleep. By this time Dixie was ready for a nap herself, so she decided to take the opportunity to nap while the babies slept. When she woke a little while later she was surprised that neither baby had woken her. She walked into the living room where Kel was sitting there with both of them having a very deep conversation about the perils of emergency medicine.

She laughed to herself. Dixie had never seen Kel as the father type before, let alone trying to be a father to someone else's kids. They were beginning to get a little fussy. It was then Kel turned and saw Dixie standing there.

"Hey there's your mommy."

"I thought I would give you a little more time to sleep, but I was just getting ready to come and get you…. they are getting hungry and I can't help with that at the moment."

"No, I don't think you can." she chuckled.

"She took Kelly from him and went to go sit in the rocking chair to nurse her.

Kel got up to leave the room.

"I hope you're not leaving on our account."

"I thought you might not want me...to, you know," he said waving his hand around.

"Why not? You've seen every part of me that can possibly be seen--we've slept together and you delivered her for heavens sake! You can't get any more personal then that, can you?"

"No, I guess not." They both laughed.

After a few minutes he figured he better get dinner for them. "Are you hungry, Dix?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact I am."

"How about I put some steaks on the grill?"

"That sounds wonderful."

Kel went to the kitchen and began dinner. Dix looked down to her second very hungry daughter and shook her head.

"I don't know Jaci. I just don't know."

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

As the next few weeks went by, Dixie returned to her old self; pretty much anyway. She hadn't really been out except to take the girls to the pediatrician and today they had another doctor's appointment; they were a month old and this time she was going to stop in the ER to show them off--everyone had been asking when she was going to bring them in. The babies were doing great--everyone thought that they were adorable and exclaimed how much like Johnny they looked--which made her feel good. They all finally made their way back home. She laid the girls down for their nap and decided to take a nap herself; she couldn't believe how tired she was after just a short outing. It did not take her long after she laid down to doze off.

When Kel walked in and saw her sleeping on the coach, he just stood there looking at her; he couldn't believe how much he wanted that second chance with her and how much he had fallen in love with Kelly and Jaci. Kel had never really given kids much thought before, but now he wished he had. He made up his mind to definitely tell her how he felt when the time was right. He just had to be patient--that's all. After all, he had waited all this time already and never thought he would even get a second chance, so the least he could do was have patience--which was never his strong suit to begin with--but he was working on it and was determined that he wasn't going to screw it up this time.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

A couple of months passed, Dix had gone back to work just part time to start with. The girls were sleeping fairly long periods at night and she and Kel had fallen into a new, comfortable routine in their lives with the babies.

Kel was thinking that she was probably going to start looking for her own place soon, so he was ready for her when she brought the subject up. What he didn't know was that Dixie didn't want to leave anymore then Kel wanted her to go.

Dixie definitely knew she had fallen for the dark haired doctor all over again. Although she knew she would never have the connection with him that she did with Johnny, Dixie knew that she loved him and could make a life with him and be happy. Maybe they would even have a couple more kids...eventually, that is. _'How am I going to tell Kel how I feel?'_ Dixie sighed wishfully. _'Hopefully I'll know when the time is right.'_

That night over dinner the two chatted about everything and nothing in particular. After they had ordered, Kel decided to attempt a start at the future he dreamed of. "Hey Dix, how would you like to get out and do something fun this weekend? The only thing you really have done since the girls were born is go back to work 2 days a week."

"It does sound nice, what did you have in mind?"

"Well it's not supposed to be too hot, so I thought that maybe we could just go down to the pier for a little while and maybe grab a bite to eat. The girls should tolerate that fairly well."

"That sounds nice, Kel, but what made you decide this?"

Kel just shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know; I just know you really don't go anywhere and just thought that it would be nice to get out and do something different. You don't really do anything but hang around the house taking care of Kelly and Jaci."

"True."

Saturday rolled around before they knew it. Unbeknownst to each other, they both had plans on telling each other how they felt today. After walking around for little while, they decided to get something to eat and it was time to feed the girls. They sat there for a few minutes neither saying anything, then at the same time they both started to talk.

"Kel, I wanted to tell you Something."

"Dix I wanted to talk to you."

They both stopped and laughed. "You go," they both said in unison." This caused both to laugh even harder.

Kel held up his hand motioning Dixie to go first.

"Dix, go ahead."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, go ahead."

"Okay, Kel. You know how we talked about that I would get my own place when I got back on my feet after the babies were born? Well…."

Kel was looking down at his hands when he blurted out, "You don't have to, you know." He kept his head down, afraid to look at her reaction.

"I don't have to what, Kel?"

He nervously looked up at the equally nervous woman sitting across from him. "Move out."

"Well that's what I wanted to talk to you about."

"O-kay," he said, worried about where this was going to go.

"Kel, how do you feel about me?"

He looked into her eyes for a minute. "Dix, when you were with Johnny, I dated a couple of women but I realized what I gave up with you, so I decided that if I ever got a second chance to be with you…I wouldn't let you go this time. Dix, I love you. I always have; I just never knew how much. It took loosing you to make me realize just how much. I know what you had with Johnny was something special--something that you will never have with me--but I know if you give me another chance we can have a good life together. I love you, Dix."

When he was done she had tears in her eyes; she didn't know what to say, she wasn't at all prepared for this. "Kel, I have always cared for you and loved you as a friend..."

Kel's heart fell, thinking the worst was about to come.

"...but over these last few months, it has become more then that. Kel, I think I'm falling in love with you all over again."

Kel was in a state of shock to say the least; he had hoped this was how she felt but he never expected it.

"I'm not ready for a relationship yet, but I like the way things are going. Would you be willing to give me…us…time to see if we have a chance again at a relationship together?"

"Dix, I would be more then happy to take things slow. I would be ecstatic to give us a second chance. I wont rush you, I'll give you all the time that you need."

"Thank you, Kel."

With that, their dinner came and they quietly ate their food. Afterwards, they went home and put the girls to bed then sat on the couch and watched TV, all the while letting the earlier events sink in.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

It had been a little over 3 months since their talk on the pier. Both had been steadily growing closer but hadn't taken the final step. It had been almost a year since Johnny's death and Dixie still missed him terribly--and knew she always would--but at least she was dealing with it much better and smiled more at his memory then shed tears. Dixie also knew that Johnny had wanted her to be happy. He told her as much, but it was still hard for her. Also, she wanted to make sure Kel wasn't going to back out of committing to a permanent relationship with her, Kelly and Jaci. Yet he had stuck with her through everything--and it wasn't even his baby--or babies in this case, so she guessed if he hadn't backed out by now, he probably wasn't going too. _'So maybe he has really changed after all,'_ Dixie thought as she rocked Jaci to sleep. So that night at Dinner she decided it was time to tell him that she was ready for the final step.

As they sat and ate their dinner she knew it was definitely time to move on. "Kel I've been thinking a lot lately."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yes I have. You know when we were seeing each other before? I really loved you and you really hurt me when you left the way that you did."

"Dix, I'm so sorry about that."

She raised her hand. "Let me finish, okay, Kel?"

"Okay."

"I know how sorry you are and how much you regret it now. Part of me never stopped loving you; I truly believe that you are sincere in wanting a second chance at a life together. You have stuck with me through all of this and I don't think I would have made it if it wasn't for you. I know that you really love Kelly and Jaci as if they were your own. I never would have guessed that you would have been so good with babies--that shocked the heck out me." They both gave a chuckle at that.

"So if you still feel the same way...I would be proud to be your wife and have you as a father for Kelly and Jaci."

Kel got up, walked around to her and pulled her up and into his arms for a very long, deep kiss. She wrapped her arms around his neck and returned the kiss with equal passion.

"Are you sure this is what you want, Dix?"

"Positive, Kel." He kissed her again when the kiss ended she whispered into his ear.

"Kel, please make love to me."

He took her hand and led her to his bedroom surprised she wasn't nervous. They slowly rid each other of their clothing and Kel reached up, pulled the barrette out of her hair and let it fall down her back. He still loved her hair; it was so silky and soft. He ran his hand through it, pulling her mouth to his for another long deep embrace. He then laid her down on the bed and kissed his way down her body. She began to moan, running her fingers through his hair. "I want you...now, please." He moved up to her mouth and began to kiss her again while his hand wandered down to see if she was ready...and she was, so he settled himself between her thighs and she wrapped her legs around his waist as they slowly became one. They began to move in the age old rhythm of man and woman.

E!-E!-E!-E!-E!

They had decided that they would just go to city hall to get married, so a month later Kel, Dixie, Kelly and Jaci made their way to city hall to become a family. After they were done at city hall, Dixie wanted to go to the cemetery and place flowers on Johnny's grave. Kel waited by the Car with the girls who had fallen asleep in the backseat.

Dixie made her way over to Johnny's grave and knelt down, placing the flowers at the head stone. She ran her fingers over the words etched in stone.

John Roderick Gage

Firefighter-Paramedic

Killed in the line of duty

August 19th 1973

Loving Husband and Father

You will be missed by all whose lives you touched

"Johnny, I still miss you…I know I always will, as much as I am happy with Kel I still wish it was you here with me and the girls. I will always love you; please know that…and I will never let the girls forget who their father is. Someday we will be together again, I Promise. I love you"

After a couple of minutes she wiped the tears from her eyes, got up and walked back to the car to start her life again.


End file.
